The Villain In Me

The poker faced cameraman said cheese

I thought, “I will have swiss cheese please”

The starter said, “Get on your marks”

Secretly, I was ready to fart

The referee pointed and said, “Get off the pitch

I swore, “Not my fault the guy was a bitch”


The train conductor said, “Who pulled that emergency cord?”

As I speed down the corridor on my skateboard

The teacher said, “Who wrote that silly limerick on the blackboard?”

And I hid behind the brick wall listening to Pink Floyd

The grumpy lecturer said, “Who lit that smoke-bomb in the Library?”

I was last seen mischievously rescuing the principal’s secretary




Ivor Steven (c) April 2021

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ivor20

G'day, and welcome to my blog site. My name is Ivor Steven, I live in Geelong, Australia. I'm an ex-industrial chemist, and a retired plumber, and a former Carer of my wife(Carole), for 30 years, who suffered from severe MS. I Write poetry about those personal thoughts, throughout and beyond my life as a Carer. I've been blogging for over 2 years, and writing poems for 19 years. Of course a lot of my poems are about my favourite subject Carole, but since I've been blogging my writings have become quite varied, humourous, mystical, observational, and even a few monster/horror poems.

25 thoughts on “The Villain In Me”

  4. HAHAHAHAHA*snort*!!! 😀 Love this, Ivor! A fun, funny, snort-laugh-bringing poem! Brilliant! 🙂
    Doesn’t sound like villainy to me…sounds like fun! 😀 😛
    Hmm…if that IS villainy…then I have some villain in me! 😮 😉 Especially related to those first 3!
    HUGS!!! 🙂
    PS…Now I have funny-villain names flowing through my mind…The Joker is obvious, but how about Darth Prankster…or Dr. Farceur…or Hannibal Laughter…or Comic-ilator. 😀

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    1. Haha 😆 I love writing my humourous pieces .. I get a good laugh myself. .. and yes. .. I was young and mischievous, with all the above being basically true !!
      Although Carole wasn’t the principal’s secretary .. she was the CEO’s secretary of the Alcoa plant here in Geelong. .. 😄😊🥰

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